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I FAILED!

April 19, 2012

I failed my driving test.  Yes, Me!  Failed!  She who has been driving for over fifty years.  She who is constantly being criticized for going too slowly. She who failed because she went too slowly down a steep hill, in the rain, in low gear (as the signs requested) and didn’t pass the truck in front of her even though she was comfortably the requisite four seconds behind him. She who also went 37 miles per hour in a 30-mile hospital zone. She was speeding!

Oh well, now I understand why all the nutters in Britain and Europe get away with it!  They drive like they’re in a Formula 1 race whether they’re on a highway or going over a one-lane country road. They zip through town, around curves, zig sagging here and there and taking to the air when a speed bump gets in their way. But – I know they’re thinking that if they don’t go fast enough they might get ticketed for going too slowly. Sounds reasonable.

I’m venting here.

I don’t fail. I got 100% on the written part of the test. I scored high on the hazard portion. I pass all my tests with flying colors. Well, almost all my tests.

Getting a driving license here in the UK is not easy, obviously. Especially for a Yank. Goodness, you’re sitting in the passenger seat, shifting gears with your left hand, watching the traffic pass you by on the wrong side of the road, and trying to steer, shift, operate the windshield wipers and turn signals — all at the same time. Oy!

So, it’s back onto the road for me with my big red L plates gleaming off the hood, front and back. In ten days, I’ll take the test again. And this time, believe me, I’ll do thirty when the sign says thirty, and seventy even if a gale force wind is howling down the valley bringing with it snow and sleet and cars and trucks are pulled over waiting for it to pass. If the sign says seventy, I’m doing seventy. Or maybe not.

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. Malcolm permalink
    April 19, 2012 4:11 pm

    Never mind you will get it next time xx

  2. Trudi permalink
    April 19, 2012 4:26 pm

    Gives you a good challenge. I have faith! All the signs are there -punintended

  3. PAUL SEAL permalink
    April 19, 2012 4:29 pm

    My poor sweetie pie…. next time get an examiner that looks happy. The man who failed you looked like the strink in the film – Miracle on 34th St….. a mean sour puss!

  4. Pat permalink
    May 1, 2012 2:41 pm

    Jann,
    Try to pick a day when the sun is shining! At least you won’t have to worry about the windshield wiper knob.

    Isn’t it amazing they let foreigners (like George and I) drive rental cars without ANY experience at driving on the left side of the road???

    Pat

  5. June 11, 2012 10:18 pm

    Join the club. SWhen I returned to England from Italy, they wouldn’t accept my good little Irish driving licence, so I had to take a test. I failed! Stationary before a red light by a pedestrian crossing, I suddenly though, ‘What am I doing! Nobody is crossing!’ So I moved off correctly in first gear, then saw in the mirro that the lights were sttill red.
    ‘I’ve failed!’ I said. ‘You have,’ he replied. Nobody walked over the pedestrain crossing.
    Valerie

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